Just Ignore the Diety behind the Curtain

As my friend Peter sometimes says, What’s with today today?

I spent an entire afternoon writing an article explaining SEO for an audience of otherwise technologically daft MPSes.

(MPS = Male, pale and stale)

I’ve been writing articles for a publication for some months through the association of my employer. The editor-in-chief of said publication is looking for “my involvement” at his two-day summit this June. I have this fear that we’ll figure out the details of “my involvement” just as my employer sells and lays us all off. In my head, that awkward conversation would yield in a business proposition as askew as “my involvement” sounds.

My vivid imagination aside, this afternoon was peppered with the following highlights:

(1) As I was finishing up my workout, the girl next to me asked what the secret was to comfortably wearing spandex shorts during a workout. So I told her. And watched the horror spread slowly across her flushed face.

(2) The one thing PC users can do that Mac user’s can’t. I thought about sending this to my snobby Mac-whore co-workers this afternoon and then remembered it’s generally better to make friends as opposed to losing them. Anyway, it’s a little heavy on the profanity (which is like the pot calling the kettle black, believe me), and the whole Mac = Gay thing is totally lame, but worth a read for this line alone:

If I want to manufacture biological weapons with my copy of iTunes, I will, fascists. Ditch this bullshit.

Classic.

(3) The ransom note generator. I wondered who would’ve taken the time to cut out little letters for the faux ransom note that was taped to my computer last week, and finally learned of the RNG this afternoon. Kind of creepy I think, and it definitely doesn’t hold a candle to the tombstone generator or, my favorite, the church sign generator.

(4) A snippet of conversation with my best buddy James which yielded the quote of the day:

Me: I’m in a bitchy mood this afternoon. For reasons unknown and immature. I hate that. WHY DO I HAVE A UTERUS?

James: For smugglin’ stuff.

Yeah. I don’t have anything that can top that for the time being.

[Jam of the Day]: Tapes ‘n Tapes, Manitoba

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One response to “Just Ignore the Diety behind the Curtain

  1. Large sign generator list on CustomSignGenerator.com

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