Where the Frack is my Stimulus Check?

I’ve been dealing with some anger issues this week. I won’t get into the how or why of all that, but rest assured that D is pretty much the best person on the planet, not only for seeing me through my times of anger, but for releasing me from it, using a variety of tactics.

Nonetheless…

WHERE IS MY STIMULUS CHECK?

It’s not like I’m hard-up for the extra six bills, it’s just that ever since I got the letter saying, “Hey, your stimulus check should arrive shortly,” I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR MY STIMULUS CHECK TO ARRIVE SHORTLY.

So what’s the deal, is it just me? Did my crooked landlord run off with my check while she was back in town? (I KNOW that’s irrational, but I have to blame someone seeing as it’s the 21st century and all personal accountability has vanished.) Or maybe the government still thinks I live in Colorado. Or Iowa. Which means it’s sitting unopened on my dresser chez parental units. Maybe I’ll call and check up.

Tell me, median-income friends—has your check arrived yet? Please tell me. I feel all alone.

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9 responses to “Where the Frack is my Stimulus Check?

  1. Hhhhmmm… that is reason to be angry. I have hope for you though. James just received his last week and I received mine 2 months ago. It has something to do with our social security numbers – I scored a way better number when I born apparently. Even though I was born after him? There really is no logic to anything our government does. Good luck to you, friend!

  2. Oh, boy. See. This is the story of my life this week. I freak out and then read something like, “They send it direct deposit…”

    Which it was. To my old bank account. On May 7.

    I’m such an idiot. Also, that’s the account I used to pay for my plates & tags, so the fundage is gone and spent. 😦

    I have such sympathy for my boyfriend.

  3. Oh NO!!!! 😦 That is no fun – no fun! What a bummer. Well, it’s Friday and you can drink extra cocktails tonight – and, D will be there for all the sympathy required. Hang in there sister… the shitty week is quickly coming to a close.

  4. D is unfortunately nowhere to be found, that jerk.

  5. Poor D has to work all night. And Sunday. Which is OK—we’ll have cocktails tomorrow!

  6. I can’t tell you exactly when because my online statement doesn’t go back far enough. I CAN tell you it was prior to May 15th.

    Don’t you love that the federal govt. chooses to pay for all of those update messages to go through the mail? How efficient.

    Best part of your post: “it’s the 21st century and all personal accountability has vanished.”

  7. Peter! Hey. And thanks. I’m salty lately.

    And yeah, that was the dumbest waste of mail I’ve ever seen. “Hey. We’re sending your check. But this isn’t it. Kthxbye.”

    Dumb.

  8. have you received your stimulating check yet???

  9. Ha…yes. See comment #2 in this thread, noting my idiocy.

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